Sunday, August 13, 2006

A New Post for the Heckler Among Us

If you give a Mom a muffin,
She'll want a cup of coffee to go with it.
She'll pour herself some.
The coffee will get spilled by her three year old.
She'll wipe it up.

Wiping the floor, she will find some dirty socks.
She'll remember she has to do some laundry.
When she puts the laundry in the washer,
She'll trip over some snow boots and bump into the freezer.
Bumping into the freezer will remind her she has to plan dinner for tonight.

She will get out a pound of hamburger.
She will look for her cookbook (101 Things to Make with a Pound of Hamburger).
The cookbook is sitting under a pile of mail.
She will see the phone bill which is due tomorrow.
She will look for her checkbook.

The checkbook is in her purse that is being dumped out by her two year old.
She'll smell something funny.
She'll change the two year old.
While she is changing the two year old the phone will ring.
Her four year old will answer it and hang up.

She remembers that she wants to phone a friend to come for coffee on Friday.
Thinking of coffee will remind her that she was going to have a cup.
She will pour herself some.

And chances are......
If she has a cup of coffee......
Her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it.

8 comments:

ljm said...

oh my...that was awesome, you!

Anonymous said...

Are you trying to tell me that you know the Muffin Man who lives on Drewry Lane?

JJ said...

Xactly!

Loreo said...

You are a hilarious literary genious, Janelle! You should send that to some magazine. Bravo and ha ha!!!! :)

Anonymous said...

Man, can't you post something not plagiarized?

Anonymous said...

Did you write that? Much improved over the original tale about the mouse which really annoys me...great stuff:)

Anonymous said...

I am just surprised you know how to spell "plagiarized."

JJ said...

I did not write it...GOSH!

I wasn't trying to take credit...GOSH!

I didn't mean to playggerise.

I have had it emailed to me numerous times across the years and I don't recall seeing an author listed.

But it checked out as the gospel truth at snopes.com so I thought it was worthy to appear on my blog without compromising its integrity.

I have failed you all.